I DO NOT love TV. Once we cancelled cable for a year and it was fantastic. If there is nothing to watch then no one turns on the TV. Hooray!
I watch maybe 2-3 hours of TV a week (and turn on food network for random noise sometimes too). Of course that means I am the perfect TV nazi mom and never let my kids watch TV either.
I wish.
Unfortunately I blew it with Alyssa and let her get hooked on The Wiggles when she was Chloe's age and she has been a TV bug ever since.
Last school year I let her watch TV in the morning while getting ready for school for 15 minutes to keep her from waking Chloe and Alex but today when she turned on the TV I thought, no way are we doing that again. The earlier you turn on the TV, the more it stays on throughout the day.
Alex and Chloe are not interested in TV. Alex has my infinitesimal attention span and can't sit through a show. He turns on the TV but always wanders off to do something else. Chloe will point to the TV and say "movie" and then immediately remove herself from the scene.
But Alyssa likes TV, and the computer.
We do pretty well about keeping the TV off during the summer but when the weather starts to cool we resort to media more often. Ideally I would never turn on the TV during the day, but I am guessing that even the best Wisconsin moms run out of things to do indoors during the winter and so eventually the TV goes on.
So the question is, how much media is too much?
My opinion is that kids should only be allowed an hour or 1 1/2 hours of media time a day, max. That can be spent on TV or the computer. Do I always follow that? No, but I am always happiest when I do.
We don't own a video game console and I hope we never will, although I admit that may be unrealistic. I just don't want to purposely invite things into my home that will segregate me from my kids and cause us to waste our time.
We also have a no TV's in bedrooms rule at our house and I hope we can stick to our guns with that one too.
I do use the TV to watch my kids while I shower and cook dinner. Oh, and when we have friends over and are trying to keep our kids and their kids playing nicely together so that we can gab. Any other time I turn it on I feel guilty. Is that normal? I feel like there is more I should be doing with them but sometimes I can't think of what. We cook, clean, play games, craft, read, go to parks, the library, shopping, etc. but sometimes there is still empty time left in the day.
What do you do with it? Especially in the winter when going outside is NOT an option unless you want kidsicles.
How much TV should make a mom feel guilty? Because if Seth comes home and asks what we did and the kids say nothing I always want to shrivel up and fade away. I feel like I took a day of their lives and threw it away.
I know, I beat myself up..A LOT! I am the only mom these kids have got though and the responsibility to raise them right weighs on me and I know I am not always doing it right. See, didn't I tell you the school year makes me more stressed out. Ha,Ha!
Anyhow, we were talking about media. What is too much? What rules do you follow?
And remember we are just weighing in our opinions...no judging and no getting offended allowed. There are lots of different ways to be a good parent.
So go ahead, weigh in...
Second Week of School
3 years ago
12 comments:
I love, love, love the method my sister-in-law used when her kids were young. She put 10 pennies (or tokens or anything like that) in a jar next to the tv at the beginning of the week for each child. They could redeem one penny for a half hour of tv time. If one child redeemed a penny and another child wanted to watch the show with, they had to use a penny too. At the end of the week, my sister in law paid the kids fifty cents for each penny left. I loved the idea, because it limited tv time to a set limit (5 hours a week and that included movies), but it let her children decide when they were going to use it. Saved lots of tantrums. She did have exceptions for family movies that if they sat down as a family for movie time, that was free for the kids. I hope when i have kids that I can limit them to 5-6 hours a week of media time.
I am with you there! Media is a balancing act that is never ending. My personal philosophy is that TV was made for parents. Meaning, that my kids watch tv when I need them to. Every day they watch when I cook. I use it as a bribe, and as a babysitter when we need them to be quiet and still either for our enjoyment or our sanity. I personally don't like tv's in bedrooms. Anyones bedroom. I had one when I was a teenager and I stayed up all the time watching it. Thankfully there wasn't anything but infomercials later than 11pm in Green River, but if there was, how could my parents have had any control over what I watched?
I feel bad if my kids watch more than an hour of tv a day. It happens, and I'm sure it will happen a lot more. I can't imagine what it's like out there in the winter. That is one of those forgotten or unrealized blessings for me in living where the weather is so mild.
As for the video game things. After this summer when we all had so much fun with the wii, I think that we will ask Santa for one for Christmas. I liked that almost all of the games were group games and a lot of them were get up and move games. But really, up until this summer I was holding out for never getting a video game console.
TV, it's a love hate thing.
Julie,
With the new Tivo systems you can record up to 4 simultaneous broadcasts. In theory this allows 96 viewing hours per day. Just some parameters to consider.
Dad
Ok, so when we found out we were pregnant, Michael and I immediately canceled the cable and internet, at first for money purposes. Then we realized how nice it was to take the time we were watching TV and playing on the internet to be reading, talking, or doing some other fun activity. When William was born, all we had were a bunch of Simpsons DVDs, and since it took me a while to recover from the cesarean, Michael and I would watch them at night after dinner while I was breastfeeding. Now, every time we turn on the Simpsons at home, William turns his little head, or crawls over and stares straight at the TV. :) Luckily, this is the only show he's hooked on! So far! I find that I would also rather do other things than watch TV with William, but I have enjoyed putting on some of the Baby Einstein videos for him. He seems to like them and we learn together, so I consider it somewhat on the good side. As far as getting him hooked on a particular show during the week or whenever, I'd really rather not. I feel like I wasted too much of time doing just that. Plus, William shares the same attention span as Alex and Chloe...which I hope may change a little as he gets older so I might actually have the option of having him watch something while I'm cooking or getting ready...ah yes, that would be nice. I will say though that I've become a big fan of Wife Swap since Michael has been gone. After William is off to bed and my head is running, sometimes I very much enjoy forgetting everything with a nice healthy dose of Wife Swap! That's my two cents!
And when it comes to video games, my biggest kid is at boot camp, and I know he'll be waiting to get back to some serious gaming...so I know games will be an issue in our home...wish us luck! :)
Okay, so I might be on the opposite end of things here, but I think the TV can be great...as long as its used right. Since we moved to WI, we dont get any local channels, so it has limited our use a lot. But my kids love to watch TV, and I dont think theres anything wrong with that...if they are watching educational shows. They have learned so much from shows like between the lions, Seseme Street, Super Why, Cyber Chase etc. The PBS shows are really great at teaching simple pre-school concepts like reading, letters and math. And also manners, respect, kindess, and problem solving. That doesnt mean I just let them watch TV all day, but I think if they are getting something out of it, then I dont see a problem. We have never had cable. I do think the shows like sponge bob etc. are a waste, and if thats what my kids were watching, I would limit their time severely. But PBS is a great tool. Usually they just like it on for background noise while they play anyway.
I do limit the computer time to an hour a day in the summer, and during school they dont get on it much at all. I think my sanity as a parent is extremely important, because I am no good to my kids if am I a basket case. If the TV helps give me some quiet time, and ability to get things done, thats great!
Also, we got the Wii for Christmas, and its better than any other console I think, because it does get them up and moving, and it helps develop co-ordination and balance. Just buy the active games!
I think if you are creative enough to find things to do with your kids everyday to keep busy, you are awesome. Keep that up!
OK, I'm old and grew up in a different time. We had only one TV and I was allowed to watch a couple of shows at night with my parents. It was their choice what to view but they kept my taste in mind. I remember Ozzie & Harriet and the Flintstones in prime time. During the day kids were outside, riding bikes or skating or just digging in the dirt. These were my "Happy Days". Now I just don't think there is much on TV I want to watch, I'd rather read a book. As for kids, you guys all watched TV but none of you seem hooked on it today.
Tonya, cute idea.
Sarah, you are a much better TV nazi than me. You are one of those moms that makes me think I am a big mess.
Dad, are you saying my kids should be allowed 4 hours TV a day then? I can easily stay within that parameter.
Stephanie, it is very fitting that Will is hooked on Simpsons. Michael wouldn't have it any other way.
Heather, I love PBS but Alyssa is too old for PBS so I have to watch her more closely. Her little friend came over and asked if we could watch "I Date a Bad Boy" on Nickelodeon. I don't even know what that is or why it is being marketed to 7 year old kids on Nick.
Mom, That is California's big selling point. You can play outside every single day. Entertaining kids for 14 hours a day indoors is a challenge.
And to all the Wii people, I do think Wii is kind of cool but I will still hold out for as long as possible. But yay for someone for making a video game that isn't violent.
I think so many of us moms are guilty of letting our kids watch a little too much t.v. Lucky for you that you have kids not really interested in it. My girls don't really like to sit and just watch either. They will come and go if the t.v. is on. Eventually, I just turn it off, and they usually don't even notice. Thankfully, this summer they discovered the outdoors and spent most of their time outside inside instead of wanting to just sit in front of the t.v.
i believe the ideal situation would be to take the TV and destroy it. That said sometimes we spend entire days with the TV on and sometimes the TV doesn't get turned on the entire day.
i feel like a good mom if the kids are doing something rather than watching something but i also find myself loving the built in babysitter.
As a recovering TV-holic, I can tell you life is better without it. There is just so much trash on it, it is neither praiseworthy or of good report from an adult perspective. This is not to say I don't indulge. For this I have really enjoyed my netflix account where I have more control over what I watch.
As for my kids, I agree with your PBS friend - we don't get cable so if the kids do watch television it is PBS. The programs are nice, though I am indifferent to their educational quality - in the long run they have little impact on that. I think it is more just to appease parent's conscious of letting their kids watch tv. Kids learn infinitely more by playing. However, I like that PBS is free of messages every seven minutes of what products my kids should buy. That is one lesson my kids can do without.
I do wonder what parents did before there was TV or what the kids did - I think it was just expected you stayed out of your parents and if you didn't like it too bad. Lately I've questioned my own practice of getting my three year old to calm down by letting him watch something on tv - perhaps short circuiting his own ability to develop his emotional coping skills. Ahh but it is hard when tv is so much easier.
Oh and I also like that penny method - I'm going to give that a whirl.
I didn't have a tv growing up at all so if it wasn't for my kids watching cartoons in the wee hours of the morning so Mom can sleep in a little it wouldn't get turned on at all. My kids do love to play computer games though so I always struggle with how much time should I allow them. Obviously anything in excess is unhealthy but sometimes it is really tempting to let them keep watching or playing so I can get stuff done around the house. Don't beat yourself up too much. I know moms who do let their kids watch tv and play video games all day and think nothing of it. At least you know it's not healthy and try to limit their time.
Post a Comment